Muted

I had woken up in the middle of the night.
we fell asleep with the television on.
I turned on my side
watched you sleeping.

You were on your back,
your head tilted towards me.
Hair falling over the side of your face,
still damp from the shower we shared.

You looked calm in the T.V. light
Eyelids softly rippling from movement.
Your right hand
out from under the blanket
over your heart.

I stared at you,
wondering what mystical lottery
it was that I won,
to be here
sharing this bed with you.
And then your eyes opened;

You looked at me,
said nothing,
but touched my cheek and lips.
While turning on your side
you leaned up and kissed me
and closed your eyes.

In that perfect place
between sleep and reality,
where we are most vulnerable and honest,
You felt it fine to kiss me
and hold my hand.
Since then, I have been trying to get there
and join you.